Friday, November 21, 2014

Five on Friday: Taglines for My New Exercise Video Series

On my personal Facebook page the other day, I was whining about how cold it was and coming to the realization that I must hate exercise videos a lot because I chose to go run in the cold instead of stay inside and exercise. I shared a picture of myself bundled up and lamented that no amount of Chaka Khan being blasted into my ears could make running in that sort of weather okay.

One of my friends said she wanted ME to make some exercise videos so naturally I began entertaining this notion immediately. I need to have a niche, you know, something to set MY exercise videos apart from the rest so started coming up with some taglines. They are:

1. Exercise videos for people that hate exercise videos but don't mind a little Chaka Khan.

2. Exercise videos for people who can't even with going to the gym.

3. Exercise videos for people who have to kick toys out of the way to start and yell at kids to leave them alone to finish.

4. Exercise videos for people who have crappy non-matching exercise clothes and might need a soup can for a hand weight.

5. Exercise videos for people who go through all the motions but are spending the entire time thinking things like "Did I sign that paper for school? No, I don't think I did so maybe I'll stop when I go past school later. No you absolutely will not stop, if he wants to join the club, he needs to be responsible and get me to sign the paper. WAIT A MINUTE, do I have any idea what's for dinner? If we're going to the library after school and I have that meeting later tonight I'd better fix something in the afternoon but SHIT I totally forgot to put cannellini beans on my shopping list, didn't I? Okay after these sit ups I'll call neighbor and see if she has a can I can borrow. Don't forget, don't forget, 3 more, SHIT this is hard, 2, oh my god I'm dying I cannot do one more yes you can ONE and DONE!"

Hmm, maybe that last one is a little too long . . .

No comments:

Post a Comment