It's happened to all of us: out on a quick errand or small, outdoor, socially-distanced get-together and we see someone we know from our old, pre-pandemic lives. Or is it them? It's hard to tell with the mask and fogged-up glasses . . . no, no, it's definitely them. Because here they're walking right towards you, smizing and saying, "How have you been?"
How to answer that question this year? Let's see . . . remote learning is soul draining, we're alternately filled with gratitude and completely sick of each other, we can't really complain but will anyway . . . ?
A few times I've simply smized right back at them and said, "That's a loaded question in 2020, isn't it?"
But I don't like it. I keep thinking there has to be something better to say. Over the past eight months, I've been delighted to see all of the adaptations people have come up with: drive-by birthdays, zoom holidays and, fine, even remote learning. We should be able to come up with some alternate greetings, too. Here are my suggestions:
1. Walk up to friend, smize and say, "Still standing?" Hopefully this become a trend with everyone understanding that as long as they are still metaphorically standing, they are to respond by breaking out in song.
3. For that corny-uncle-type: "Covid enough for ya?" (Oh please don't actually ever say that. I already have regrets for even thinking of this one.)
4. Watched everything available on Netflix yet?
5. Or use this handy flowchart to decide on the ultimate alternate 2020 greeting:
|(Click to enlarge)|