Friday, June 1, 2018

Five on Friday: Behind the Scenes

If somehow you found my blog without following me somewhere else on social media, I'll just fill you in: I told a story for The Moth which was aired two weeks ago. A video of it was shared on Hey Iris earlier this week and has been getting a lot of attention.

View from the stage of the Folly Theater in Kansas City, MO

The response to my video has been mind-blowing. Each time I check on it, the numbers of likes, shares, comments and views seems to have jumped exponentially. An adoptive father from Finland let me know that it was shared on a Finnish Adoption page and a woman from California wants to show it in her Foster Parent training classes. Multiple agencies and support groups are sharing it with their followers.

I was going to make today's list about my favorites of these responses but I am notoriously bad at picking favorites. I claim "rainbow" as my favorite color, okay? So how I think I'd narrow down the thousands (literally!) to just five is beyond me. Fine, this one definitely makes the cut, but after that I'm a total loss:

Also I think I need to make sure credit is being given where credit is due, so for today's list I'm going to shed some light and share a little gratitude, for:

1.  The good, nice, competent, wonderful case and social workers we did have. I realize the only impression I give in my story is that they all were unreliable. Unfortunately that was true for many that we had. But I will always remember  the ones that broke the stereotype, particularly the older woman who spent her monthly visits with us in a Grandmotherly fashion cuddling babies on the couch. 

2. My kids: My biological kids, you didn't know Daddy and I were taking you on a roller coaster ride. Thanks for accepting all of it (the case workers' questions, the siblings you didn't know if you'd be able to keep and all the new extended family we never knew we'd have) without puking.

My adopted kids, for challenging what I thought I knew. For hurling "You're not my real Mom" at me those times when you were really hurting. It doesn't hurt my feelings to acknowledge that you do, in fact, have another Mom. And if you feel safe enough to show me your deepest pain and biggest anger, that makes me feel pretty real as a Mom, too.

3. Jen Hixson, my Director at The Moth for helping me weave a thousand loose strands into a beautiful tapestry. I'm also grateful to Jen for understanding and defending my choice to not add in parts that were too private or not mine to tell.

4. My husband, the half of this partnership that prefers the auditorium seats to the stage.  Just because he's not up there with me doesn't mean he hasn't been right here with me. My life is completely magical and I can trace it all back to that time I met a boy in Freshman Choir.

5. My kids' biological family for welcoming, accepting and loving us. People try to give me a lot of credit for our relationship happening. I tell them all the same thing: "Relationships are two-way streets."
 "Yes," they say, "but you reached out."
 "Yes," I say, "but they reached back."


  1. I love this so much! (I also loved that comment - lol) - Jess

  2. You’re an incredible inspiration to me. I love the way you chose to share the realness of your family’s story, but more importantly, I appreciate the incredible growth, humility, gratitude and wisdom that I see in you that I strive for.